Whether you’re at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt’s End …
*The Cowboys didn’t draft anyone in Thursday night’s first round of the NFL Draft. Which means, of course, they didn’t draft a quarterback. Which means, one of DFW’s weirdest streaks continues. In a league dictated and dominated by quarterbacks, the Cowboys haven’t drafted one in the first round since 1989 and a guy named Troy Aikman. It’s the NFL’s second-longest stretch behind the Saints, who took Archie Manning way back in 1971.
*On our PressBoxDFW Live! vodcast this week, iconic Cowboys’ radio voice Brad Sham said to expect Dallas to use the 58th overall pick on a defensive lineman. He also says Dak Prescott is worth a contract extension at $30 million per season. Why? “Well,” Sham said. “Do you have a better plan at quarterback?”
*Not sold on Kyler Murray as the No. 1 overall pick. For one thing – and I’m serious about this – the kid has no experience handling adversity. At Allen High School and OU over the last seven seasons he’s 57-3. How does he handle starting 2-6 with the crappy Cardinals?
*The Rangers’ Joey Gallo was named AL Offensive Player of the Week. He could already be named MLB Unique Player of the Year. Last week he produced the first sacrifice fly of his career, spanning 1,337 at-bats. How is that even possible? Just as strange, he’s the first player in baseball history – they’ve been swinging bats at pitches since 1869 – to hit 50 homers before hitting 50 singles (47). But the dude is must-see TV, evidenced by his mammoth homers and even a pop-up with a 7.5-second hang time that totally befuddled the Astros last week.
*The Stars beat Nashville in the first round of the NHL Playoffs mainly because they held the Predators to 0-of-15 on Power Plays. In Game 1 against the St. Louis Blues Thursday night, whatd’ya know? Dallas gave up a Power Play goal early and goalie Ben Bishop allowed two soft goals between his legs in the 3-2 loss. Sports.
*In news that surprises no one, the Mavericks are the most popular NBA team in Europe. Thanks, Dirk Nowitzki and Luka Doncic. The Mavs, who had seven international players on their 12-man roster this season, saw their regional ratings spike 86 percent and their overseas numbers increase 34 percent. In Slovenia, Doncic’s home, NBA League Pass subscriptions went up 186 percent. Can we assume that means they went from 0 to 186? Wait, that’s horrible math. But you get the point.
*Wait, do you actually have horses in the back? The catchy ditty “Old Town Road” by Billy Ray Cyrus and Lil Nas X may not be the greatest song ever recorded. But in this age of divisiveness, polarization and heightened racial tensions, anything that brings black and white together for a common cause is worth tapping my toe to. Consider it Ebony and Ivory, 2.0.
*Sorry, but on Monday I rank Bobby Carpenter on the list of the Cowboys’ worst all-time draft picks. Then on Thursday I see him on ESPN, sure enough, analyzing this year’s draft. Taken 18th overall by Bill Parcells in 2006, he busted his way to only three starts in four years. Just can’t take his breakdown seriously, any more than I could trust Wile E. Coyote on how to cook roadrunner.
*Last time the Cowboys started a draft with this low of a pick, it was an unmitigated disaster. This year it’s No. 58. In 2009 it was No. 69 and a trail of trash: Jason Williams. Robert Brewster. Stephen McGee. Victor Butler. Brandon Williams. DeAngelo Smith. Michael Hamlin. David Buehler. Stephen Hodge. John Phillips. Mike Mickens. Manuel Johnson. That dirtiest of dozen comprises the worst draft in franchise history.
*Speaking of Aikman and ’89, fun fact about that draft: No. 8 had a pretty good run and all, but the guy the Cowboys drafted in the second round behind him actually had a longer career with more appearances in the Pro Bowl and All-Pro teams. Offensive lineman Steve Wisniewski was traded to the Raiders for Daryl Johnston. In Oakland, Wisniewski was an absolute stud that made the NFL’s 1990s All-Decade Team.
*Apropos of nothing, I came across this nugget while doing interviews for an upcoming story that has nothing to do with sports: During the U.S. invasion of Panama in 1989, American troops cornered rogue ruler Manuel Noriega in a house outside Panama City. But to get him to leave his bunker and surrender, American troops brought in PSYOP (psychological operations) speakers. The things are massive, requiring an 18-wheel trailer for transport. With six of those speakers ringing his compound and blaring everything from Ozzy Osbourne to AC/DC, Noriega walked out his front door after three days with his hands up.
*If you liked the book, 12 Mighty Orphans, you’ll be happy to hear it’s being made into a movie. Filming is scheduled to start in July in Fort Worth and Weatherford. Casting pitches have been made to several actors, led by Brad Pitt.
*Before you call your ex-girlfriend “crazy,” consider the insanity of Phoenix nutjob Jacqueline Ades. She claims she was once abducted by Walt Disney, and that’s not the half of it. After a man didn’t call her back for a second date, Ades sent him 159,000 texts over a six-month period. And that’s not the half of it. Among the spiciest missives, she threatened to “make sushi outta ur kidneys n chopsticks outta ur hand bones” and “bathe in your blood.” And that’s not the half of it. Ades turned down a plea deal that would’ve kept her out of jail, reasoning that a jury will not only find her “not guilty, but also rule that we must get married.” Say hi to your ex for me when you call her to say “all is forgiven.”
*If you still bank with Wells Fargo, no sympathies. Protesters totally shut down the bank’s shareholders meeting Tuesday night DFW Airport’s Grand Hyatt Hotel. Why? Because Wells Fargo is trying to convince you everything is business as usual, even though it paid a $190 million fine for its employees opening fraudulent accounts in customers’ names and another $1 billion penalty for charging customers hundreds of thousands for auto insurance they didn’t need and hadn’t ordered. They’re documented crooks. Not sure how they’re allowed to stay in business. But at this point it’s beyond buyer beware.
*Portland’s Damian Lillard won his team’s first-round series against the Thunder with a walk-off, step-back 37-foot jumper. For years Golden State’s Steph Curry has pushed the limits of rational range. I also saw the Jazz purposefully play defense behind James Harden, as to take away his step-back 3-pointer and make him drive. Baseball is also changing, via radical defensive shifts and relievers starting games. But football? I mean, maybe the passing games these days feature quicker releases and shorter routes. But other than a dramatic shrinking of shoulder-pad size, the last major stylistic or strategical change came when Roger Staubach took a shotgun snap in 1975.
*If you revere former Dunbar High School hoops legend Robert Hughes, be at The Modern Art Museum of Fort Worth on Thursday for the premiere of the documentary on his life: 5700 Ramey Ave: The Story of Robert Hughes.
*In sports there are impressive records, and then are feats that will never be duplicated, much less topped. Twenty years ago this week, former Ranger Fernando Tatis, playing for the Cardinals, hit two grand slams … in the same game … in the same inning … off the same pitcher. Just can’t ever imagine that happening again. No way.
*Earth Day was this week, another sign that only one species on this planet has to set aside a day to remind itself not to trash its home.
*Dug into the analytics provided by my Fitbit Versa and found something interesting about my sleep habits. Over the last year, I’ve averaged 6 hours, 14 minutes of sleep per night. Sounds alarming, but I’m rarely dragging ass. So I guess that’s my necessary recharge time. A day or a week or even a month can fluctuate, but 52 weeks is a pretty good indicator of what’s what.
*This weekend? Golf today. A 1-year-old’s birthday party Saturday. Bike ride around White Rock Lake Sunday. Hey, 2 outta 3 ain’t bad. As always, don’t be a stranger.
